Kick. Step. Kick. Step. Kick. Step. The snow here is not packed in tightly. Shift left. Look up and move on. Kick. Step. Kick. My glasses are getting frosted. Put your head up. Breath, take a sip through the camelback. The pipe is frozen. The rope linking me to my team is taut. Will turn around in 4 steps. One...two...three...four...
"The rope is taut!"
"Uh, Umm...ok, I shall walk faster.", comes the response.
I heave a sigh. And start kicking.

The summit is incidental. The climb is the destination. We are climbing to the top of the mountain, but is that the summit? The mountain is a metaphor. However everyone imbues it with his or her own definitions. Some see it as a physical challenge, while others liken it to a mental struggle. Some see it as validation of their strengths and for others, it is a vindication of their worst fears. And while all this emotional interplay goes on, we all assume our chosen roles.

It must be around 17500 feet. It has to be. Then we are only 2000 ft away from the summit. The rope is taut again. Can't slow down as Nelson is trying to keep us at a steady pace. The shoe is rubbing against the ankle at every step; I should have taken a smaller size. My legs are so sore. We need to be faster if we intend to make it to the summit. That is the third team that has passed us now. It is like a New York Subway out here what with so many climbers around. It is unbelievable how monotonous and yet so enthralling this is turning out to be. Kick your feet into the snow, step into the niche and then repeat. Kick. Step. That has been my routine for the last three hours.
"Crevasse on the right"
"Crevasse on the right", I holler to the person behind me.
"Crevasse on the right"
And so the message slides down the rope team as we go up.

Mt. Cotopaxi is 19347 feet above the sea level. One of the world's tallest active volcanoes, it is famed for its almost symmetrical conical structure and a mighty glacier that starts at around 16200 feet. The first day at Quito, the twelve of us who comprised one of the two Wharton Leadership Venture teams, were sitting around in the terrace of our hotel. The sun was mild, the air clean as it should be at 10000 feet and the people, slightly nervous. We were discussing our fears and expectations from the venture. Surprisingly, for most of us it was about the process rather than the destination. How we got to the summit seemed as much if not more important than if we got to the top. Looking around, I saw friends, acquaintances and complete strangers. I wondered if I was going to learn about leadership by being around this motley collection of people over the next week. I had no idea how comprehensively wrong I was.

"He is stepping on my rope!"
I turn around to see this aggressive climber trying to pass us in the middle of trail. Cardinal rule of mountaineering: One does not pass another rope team in the middle of the trail. Step off the trail and pass on the side.
"Step off the rope!"
The guide of the other team had stepped on the rope of the person behind me and the whole team had stalled. We were unable to move. A fierce argument broke out.
"Step off the rope."
"Wait till we pass you."
"Step OFF the rope!"
And then I heard Nelson reel off some choice expletives that led to a very hurried retreat by the other guide. Funny, how some people compete against each other at every point in their lives. Its 18000 feet, cold, there is only 50% of the oxygen that we are used to and someone is trying to get ahead of you by stepping on your rope. Where's the perspective?
"Do you think we could sing as we climb?", went the voice of my teammate. I smiled to myself. I could barely breathe let alone sing. Nor could the owner of the voice.
And so we trudged along. It has been quite a while since we started. The first inklings of dawn have started appearing on the horizon. Our climb commenced at around midnight. By now, this climb was more psychological than physical. We will definitely get to the summit. However, what would we give up to get there?

Polyester T-shirt, light-weight, mid-weight, expedition-weight, Down jacket, Gotex Jacket on top of all this, Balaclava, head cap, LED helmet, Snow Goggles, ice axe, gloves (tie them to your hands with a rope), trekking pole, gaiters...the list goes on and on. It is when we set out towards the summit and it will be 90F when we get down around 1-2pm the next day. 14 hours of grueling climb with almost 90% of it on a glacier. Oh, and water. We need to carry loads of water. Figuring out all that one has to carry, ensuring we know how to tie our crampons within the 2 minutes break we would have, rope training, months of physical exercises, glacier training, countless debriefing sessions and it boils down to a 14 hour climb.
And then lets not forget the leadership part. Making decisions that impacts one's project, deadlines or grades is one thing; it is another matter to impact people's health, their chances of survival, their fears and feelings. Should we go up the physically challenging ridge during the practice climb and influence the chances of the few who were less certain about making it during the real climb? Or should we take the easier route and dampen the team morale by going against the majority? Should we build the four-member rope teams based on physical fitness or should we let people chose their own teams, always a precursor to chaos among a bunch of Whartonites. Someone is feeling faint and it is 15000 feet. What should we do now?

We are getting near now. It should not be too long before we hit the head-wall. The weather has been particularly bad. The news is that the fast team has been stuck at the head-wall for some time now. Many teams have been returning to try another day. Chris Warner, guide for the fast team, is holding out, waiting to see if the weather clears up.
We are almost there. It's a matter of minutes now. Dawn has broken and surely, it will get warmer in a bit. Just keep the focus.


I remember thinking about our reactions if something went wrong on the mountain. All our training, all our leadership, everything comes down to that particular situation. Sometimes it is not about knowing what the right thing is. Sometimes it is about knowing when to do it. Like life, in mountaineering, timing matters as much as knowledge.
And then it happened.

One of us collapsed. Minimal Motor skills, eyes glazing over, words barely getting through, things were bad. Every one of us looked worried.
"We are not going to do the summit."
The team looked up to hear Nelson say that. Suddenly, as if on cue, the collapsed person got up and with every ounce of resolve started walking. Every step was a challenge but for the next fifteen minutes, this person walked as if our lives depended on it. And then collapsed again. I still remember those fifteen minutes. I felt as if I had met determination in person.
We looked at each other. Is that it? Months of training, weeks of preparing for the trip here, and days spent briefing, debriefing, figuring out complex rope knots, climbing walls and running up and down stadium stairs. Is this what it comes down to?
"We are not going to do the summit. However, two of you guys can go up if you want to."
Another rope team had sidled by. Two of their members had dropped out earlier and they had two slots open. We looked at each other.
"Though I will need one person to come with me to ensure we get down safely", Nelson said as he pointed to my collapsed teammate.
A hand went up.
"I will go down with you."
Another hand went up.
"Me too."
Then it was up to the last member. He looked at the summit, thought, then looked at the team. The moment hung amidst the placidity of the early morning and froze in eternity.
"The team came up together. It goes down together."
The whole rope team had given up on the summit to ensure that they stayed a team.

What is success? We have been at Wharton for some time now. We are surrounded by probably, the most competent, ambitious and articulate people we will ever see. And we are all chasing success.
So what is success? Is it in reaching the summit or is the summit just a metaphor for whatever we want it to be. Don't all of us have our own summits? Cotopaxi taught me that it's important to achieve one's own summit irrespective of what the popular notion of success is.
What is character? No one really knows until it is tested. It is how we behave when we want something desperately that the true nature of our personalities show up. Cotopaxi provided all of us with a situation that truly tested our characters, and we came back knowing what we were capable of.
Finally, what is leadership? Leadership is in leading as much as following. Cotopaxi taught us that leading does not necessarily mean being in the front. That leadership is about kicking footsteps into snow so that the person behind you could have it a bit easier. It's about making hot tea and sandwiches for those who are still up on the mountain even if one is exhausted and ready to drop. It is in giving up the summit for one's teammate. It is in all those subtle ways in which we overreach ourselves and look beyond ourselves.
It is when we need something the most, be it the summit or a job, that we truly become our true selves. Hopefully at all those times, we like what we see in the mirror.
Cotopaxi held up a mirror to us on that climb. And we liked what we saw.



Walk the talk
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